


Burning House

by Lord_Byron_Mudkippington



Category: Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Angst, F/F, Unrequited
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-04-11
Packaged: 2018-06-01 16:31:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6527617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lord_Byron_Mudkippington/pseuds/Lord_Byron_Mudkippington
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I had a dream about a burning house. You were stuck inside; I couldn't get you out. I laid beside you and pulled you close, and the two of us went up in smoke. (Originally posted 10/26/15 by me on FFN)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Burning House

She was wandering through that dream again. That same damn dream she knew was only around because her mind had a perverse desire to torture her during the hours she was actually able to spend not thinking about it. Every time, she knew it wasn't real, but every time she tread the same beaten path to completion. This had never happened, of course. What she was experiencing was a mere nighttime creation, something that had never occurred in her life. Yet whenever she felt the heat running up and down her skin, real fear coursed through her veins.

The flames licked at her exposed skin as she ran up the path towards that gorgeous mansion, so opulent even as it was burning down. She knew what the outcome would be, yet she still grabbed the doorknob with her hand, only to jump back in pain as it scorched her hand. Memory kicked in as she ran towards the nearest window, taking off her shoe in order to smash it in and climb up, ignoring the sting of broken glass cutting her arms and legs. Once inside, she put the shoe back on and took off.

There was no need to yell, to see if there was anyone still inside, because she knew. The words still came to her naturally though, that name she uttered many times dying in the air without a reply. "Maki! Maki, are you in here?!" She ran past the burning staircase, expertly dodging a falling wooden beam as she went through the kitchen, pushing past the searing heat and stinging cuts as she walked the familiar way to where that grand piano lay waiting, a melodic symbol of _her_ constrained emotions.

The piano bench sat there barren, but it wasn't hard to find Maki. She was passed out on the floor, the drapes ablaze as the rest of the room hurried to catch up. Hurrying to the fallen girl, she dropped to her knees and gently rolled Maki over. Brushing aside her scarlet locks, she could tell that there was still life in her, but it was barely there, only noticeable in the faintest of breaths and the shallow rise and fall of her chest. Small, shaking arms wrapped around Maki's body, but she knew then, as she always knew, that there was no way to lift her. She just wasn't strong enough, and there wasn't enough time.

The door she had come in through was on fire now, and despite knowing that it was going to happen, surprise and fear still shook her to the core. They were surrounded by these unholy flames, and every escape route was blocked. Unlike the girl that laid next to her, her breathing was coming in rapid exhalations, eyes wandering desperately around the room. It was all futile, and she knew that, but if something would just change...

The heat was growing unbearable, and she could feel her already-depleted energy fading fast. With every ounce of strength she could muster, she laid down next to Maki and wrapped her arms tightly around the redhead's body. One faint kiss upon her paled cheek was all she would allow herself, before she laid her head down upon Maki's shoulder. Shutting her eyes tight, she wished and she waited. She wished they had more time. She wished that she could hear that beautiful voice one last time. She wished that she had been better, and she waited for their final moment together.

It was scorching hot, and the flames were growing closer. The beams of the ceiling started to topple down as the structural integrity of the house was compromised. Still she held her tight, refusing to let go as their lives came closer and closer to their untimely end. Placing one trembling hand weakly upon Maki's chest, she could feel the weakest of heartbeats, and she took bittersweet solace in knowing that she was still with her in their final moments. They took one last breath together before the two of them went up in smoke.

* * *

  
She sat on a bench in the mostly-vacant park, braving the cold weather with a heavy jacket and a cup of coffee. Without anyone around who might recognize her, it was nice to just sit back, take long sips of coffee, and feel sorry for herself. Well, except for the person specifically sitting right next to her. Well, there wasn't any reason to hide her downcast mood: her friend was always able to see right through her anyway. It was a very eerie trait of hers, but she had come to accept that her friend was just that observant. Besides, she didn't have the energy to put up some kind of front.

"Nicocchi..." Nico turned to look into her friend's concerned eyes, and she tried to put up a smile, any kind of smile to make it seem as if she was okay. It came out like some kind of grimace though, a very _Maki-like_ grimace. With a groan, she abandoned her attempt and slumped over against a welcoming shoulder, shutting her eyes. "Did you have that dream again?" She just nodded without answering.

Silence lapsed over them as a comforting hand stroked her hair, making her feel slightly more at-ease. This was the side of Nozomi that Nico appreciated the most, when the teasing and cryptic words gave way for a more quiet and understanding aura. She only wished that she could more easily follow Nozomi's advice, sage as it was. "It's not too late, Nicocchi. You can still talk to her."

Another shake of the head. "It won't do any good," she mumbled morosely, burying her face against Nozomi's shoulder. Her words were muffled into the fabric of her friend's jacket. "She'd just glare at me and walk away."

"Maki-chan's just stubborn, Nicocchi." Her hands were so warm, so soothing despite the winter chill, almost enough to put Nico to sleep. That was the last place she wanted to be, though. "Persistence usually works with her, doesn't it?"

"There's a difference between being stubborn and being resolute. I can tell when her mind's made up, and it was made up months ago." Reluctantly moving away from the comfortable warmth, Nico looked up at Nozomi with sad ruby eyes, having long ago shed the wall that kept her feelings away from Nozomi. This wasn't something she had ever wanted to burden people with, and her other friends were not privy to such a sight, but she couldn't keep these things hidden from Nozomi for long, so she let her best friend in.

Being able to talk to Nozomi about these things was surprisingly nice, though it only kept her spirits up for so long before they sank back down to the dark depths that they usually resided in nowadays. It had been months since Maki had given up on Nico's grating tendencies, months since Maki had moved on. Nico hadn't, though. She suspected she never would. When you had the best, the mind just couldn't get accustomed to settling for less.

Sometimes she wondered what Nozomi was thinking in the long pauses between comforting words and helpful advice that she would never take. Did she ever have to compose herself to keep sane in the face of Nico's constant neurosis? If it was true, it wasn't likely something that she would ever admit to, so there wasn't a point in asking. It was just something she thought about from time to time. "There was something between you two. If you talk to her and say exactly how you feel, then you've left nothing to mystery."

"I just..." She used to be confident, and on stage she showcased it in spades. Her whole life had been led by having confidence in herself when nobody else did. Here, though, with this specific situation, with this specific someone, it all withered away and died. No amount of encouragement could give her the courage to do it. "I just can't." They continued to sit there together in silence. Nico was thankful that her defeatist attitude didn't chase Nozomi off, but she imagined that her friend had plenty of other, better things she could be doing. The thought was not comforting to her psyche.

* * *

  
She felt somewhat cheerful at her own party, which was something that should have been normal. It was a celebration of her new single topping the charts, a little shindig the label had put together. Most of the people there were writers, costume designers, and other staff that helped out with her career up to that point. Most of them she didn't know especially well, so she was glad that Nozomi was there too, as someone that she could at least say she knew personally.

Maybe she shouldn't have been surprised when she saw a familiar head of red hair walk across her vision. Her psychosis loved to make her see things that weren't actually there. This, however, was real. She was surprised enough to nearly drop her drink as she froze and stared at the young woman who was clearly, unequivocally Maki. The gears were shifting frantically in her mind as she tried to fish out any kind of information, any reason why her former friend was at her party. None came to mind. Why was she here?

Hope sprung anew in her chest, allowing herself to believe for a moment that this was a sign. If Maki was here, then she had to be here for her, right? And that wouldn't be the case unless there were still hidden feelings, buried beneath the surface of her heart and just waiting to be brought out into the light. Or maybe she was just crazy.

Regardless, she found herself walking towards the beautiful redhead that cursed her thoughts and haunted her dreams. Maybe she was no longer this unobtainable specter that shadowed her every step. All the cautious signs that popped up in her mind were disregarded: this had to be a sign. Maki seemed uncomfortable as she stood there, and it was clear that she hadn't noticed Nico in the crowd. That didn't matter though: what mattered was that she reached her, that she could talk to her again. That something big would happen.

Well, something big did happen. Something that stopped Nico dead in her tracks. Someone stepped out of the crowd and took Maki's hand in his own, murmuring something that she couldn't hear. Maki gave him a nervous smile, her eyes glancing around the crowd before nodding and following him. On its own, that might only give Nico mild concern. It was the kiss afterwards, the planting of lips upon that silken cheek, that sent a tidal wave of emotions crashing down upon her heart.

Maki didn't even blush, or push him away in furious surprise. Her smile became more genuine. It was impossible for Nico not to notice, and it stung her heart, pierced it like an arrow. She didn't move, she _couldn't_ move, tears quickly streaming down her face as she stared after Maki, long after she had vanished from her vision.

That man must have been involved with the record label. It would explain why Maki was there, and why she was nervous: because she knew it was Nico's event. That brought no comfort to her, and she could feel her body shutting down, leaving her staring after someone who was no longer there. That was how Nozomi found her, but before she could say anything, Nico regained control of her own body, and she brushed past Nozomi as she forced her way out of the room. She hoped no one else would see the tears that were freely spilling down her cheeks.

* * *

  
_"I'm sorry, Nicocchi. I didn't know that she would be here." Comforting hands laid upon her shoulders, but she felt nothing, staring blankly at the floor._

_"You couldn't have known." She wished she hadn't known. She wished she hadn't seen, but she had, and now it could never be erased from her memory. "It's okay." It wasn't. "She can be with whomever she wants." Why wasn't it her, though? She just wanted to leave now, but it wouldn't look very good if the person who the party was thrown for skipped out. She would just have to gut it out._

_"Nicocchi..."_

_"I just need a minute." She needed longer than that. A lifetime might not be enough. Nozomi wouldn't be fooled, she never was, but they both knew this was important for her career, and so she would have to go back out there. All she could do was gently squeeze Nico's shoulders until a minute passed, then two. At the three minute mark, Nico stood up and walked silently out, all of her tears gone. It was time to keep up appearances again._

The mansion was still on fire. The door was still hot to the touch. The window still cut her skin as she entered the house. Somehow, in its own perverse way, the scorching flames were becoming a more comforting heat, shielding her from the cold weather. Running the familiar layout gave her a sense of familiarity, and seeing the motionless redhead sent her heart soaring, even if it was laced with a stabbing sort of pain.

There was never going to be an escape, no matter how many times she looked. Still, there was one thing she had. She had this moment: she had this dream. With her arms wrapped tightly around Maki's body, she fell into her warm desires, into the one place she had left where she could hold her. Even if everything was taken away from her, this still remained. This one fictitious moment where they could be together, even if it was only for the briefest of time.

Tears leaked from her eyes and quickly evaporated in the oppressive heat, but her spirits lifted ever-so slightly at the feeling of Maki's faint heartbeat playing like her old compositions against Nico's hand. She pressed herself as close as possible and shut her eyes, the image of a Maki who smiled when in her presence imprinted upon her eyelids. She gave in to the sensations, to every soaring and crippling emotion that was sending her into a spiral of deluded misery. In this place they could be together. In this moment she could say they were one.

Every night, for as many days, as many months, as many years as she wanted, she could be with her love in their burning house. She laid there and embrace the failed wishes, the inevitable waiting, and the love she never wanted to let go of, until the two of them went up in smoke.


End file.
